Eliza, is that you?

10:50:58 PM vballinmmo: hoi
10:51:00 PM vballinmmo: hi
10:51:04 PM vballinmmo: hey
10:51:06 PM Pirate: hoy!
10:51:06 PM vballinmmo: r u on
10:51:15 PM vballinmmo: sup
10:51:22 PM Pirate: son
10:51:27 PM vballinmmo: k
10:51:41 PM vballinmmo: so what r u doing
10:51:56 PM vballinmmo: hey
10:51:57 PM Pirate: talking to some bot on IM named vballinmmo
10:52:03 PM vballinmmo: wtf
10:52:16 PM Pirate: are you a bot
10:52:41 PM vballinmmo: no i'm really a persom
10:52:46 PM Pirate: prove it, i think you are a bot
10:52:51 PM vballinmmo: hoew \
10:52:54 PM vballinmmo: how
10:53:10 PM Pirate: good try with the improper syntax above, but i am not buying it
10:53:14 PM Pirate: prove you are real now!
10:53:33 PM vballinmmo: i sware seriously want to know how
10:53:51 PM Pirate: come on Neo, prove it.. or the Agents will terminate your program!
10:54:11 PM vballinmmo: i have friends names bballinsmm and she is real
10:54:24 PM vballinmmo: yea i am hey
10:54:26 PM Pirate: you are some soulless computer program, arent you?
10:54:51 PM vballinmmo: no and sorry about the thing before
10:55:10 PM Pirate: nice try, bot. but i have no idea what that "thing" is
10:55:40 PM vballinmmo: the aim thing i typed before and how to i prove that i'm not a bot
10:55:54 PM vballinmmo: do ui have a blocked friend lovehorse111
10:55:56 PM vballinmmo: ?
10:56:03 PM Pirate: what is a love horse?
10:56:33 PM vballinmmo: it's a person that u were once friends with
10:56:46 PM Pirate: how can i have friends when you are a bot?
10:57:16 PM vballinmmo: because i'm not a bot and i was once friends with her
10:57:25 PM Pirate: what?
10:57:30 PM Pirate: que?
10:57:45 PM vballinmmo: i will what does que mean
10:57:51 PM vballinmmo: ?
10:57:52 PM vballinmmo: ???
10:58:01 PM vballinmmo: u
10:58:13 PM Pirate: el hombre con el sombrero nos envió

Banana man?

12:40:07 PM enjoiskating477: Where is banana man?
12:40:21 PM Pirate: where is your mother?
12:40:44 PM enjoiskating477: Idk at work
12:40:58 PM Pirate: working her street corner?
12:41:11 PM enjoiskating477: Yes
12:41:20 PM enjoiskating477: Fucking pussy
12:41:26 PM Pirate: in her knee high boots and micro mini-skirt
12:41:56 PM enjoiskating477: Yes didn't i just tell u that....pussy
12:42:32 PM Pirate: um no, you just said she was working her corner. i dressed her up from her normal fatty dress

Mom is still yapping

3:26:47 PM jmanning27: u there?
3:27:20 PM jmanning27: check out if mom is on when you return
3:30:20 PM jmanning27: uthere
3:31:16 PM Pirate: what?
3:31:56 PM jmanning27: mom is still yapping
3:32:33 PM jmanning27: anything else new at your place. how is your company faring
3:33:10 PM Pirate: well, i finally got rid of that hooker that had been badgering me. I finally paid her half what I owed her
3:33:27 PM Pirate: and the company is fine, we just need more parts to make the paper airplanes with
3:33:35 PM jmanning27: what hooker
3:33:49 PM Pirate: the female hooker that I have been using for the last 3 months
3:34:14 PM Pirate: you know the one with the mouth trick?

Pirate is not an Asian Chick

(09:24:57 PM) Miisz Clumzy: wannabe :D
(09:30:44 PM) Pirate: so if i am a wannabe, how did i get the name?
(09:31:26 PM) Miisz Clumzy: Is this chann ?
(09:31:38 PM) Pirate: what is a chann?
(09:33:36 PM) Miisz Clumzy: a chann is a asian chiqk from Lowell mass she's a senior at Lowell high and she also hope's to attend art school in boston :)
(09:34:32 PM) Pirate: i am definitely not an asian chick
(09:34:57 PM) Miisz Clumzy: Alright a white girl haha
(09:35:29 PM) Pirate: i think you have the wrong person
(09:35:53 PM) Miisz Clumzy: No I don't this is chanmary
(09:36:11 PM) Pirate: when was the last time you talked to this person on the SN of Pirate? which is the SN i am on now
(09:37:06 PM) Miisz Clumzy: like 10 minute's ago
(09:37:20 PM) Pirate: um, no. that was this same conversation
(09:37:33 PM) Pirate: you have never talked to Pirate before
(09:37:42 PM) Miisz Clumzy: yes
(09:37:51 PM) Pirate: when have you talked to Pirate
(09:38:21 PM) Miisz Clumzy: yes I have I'm the master of all pirate's arggh !
(09:38:33 PM) Pirate: whatever
(09:39:05 PM) Miisz Clumzy: yea I'm right
(09:39:33 PM) Pirate: right about what? you have never talked to me before tonight, and I am not the asian chick you think i am
(09:40:30 PM) Miisz Clumzy: yes huh
(09:41:05 PM) Pirate: what?
(09:41:28 PM) Miisz Clumzy: nothin chan
(09:41:52 PM) Pirate: if i am Chan, call me
(09:42:29 PM) Pirate: or better yet, tell me my phone number
(09:42:44 PM) Pirate: so i can call Chan :)
(09:43:59 PM) Miisz Clumzy: I just called you
(09:44:06 PM) Pirate: none of my phones rang
(09:44:26 PM) Miisz Clumzy: grrr, fine
(09:44:30 PM) Pirate: when did Chan tell you this was her SN?
(09:45:11 PM) Miisz Clumzy: I'm physic I know these thing's
(09:45:24 PM) Pirate: you mean psychic?

Pirate of Nazo

3:57:43 PM jerseyzzlilm6: Of Nazo heyy
3:57:55 PM Pirate: of nazo?
3:58:58 PM Pirate: you done already?
3:59:24 PM jerseyzzlilm6: Huh? Lol
3:59:39 PM Pirate: you tell me, you are the one making no sense
4:01:01 PM jerseyzzlilm6: Lol. When did I say tht?
4:01:17 PM Pirate: when you started off with "of nazo"
4:02:03 PM jerseyzzlilm6: I did? I was iming from my phone n said hey...
4:02:19 PM Pirate: why would you IM me from your phone, i have no idea who you are
4:02:42 PM jerseyzzlilm6: I'm maheen! Ramzi! Lol
4:03:01 PM Pirate: and i dont know anyone with either of those names
4:03:27 PM jerseyzzlilm6: Whts ur sn
4:03:40 PM Pirate: you tell me, you are IM'ing me at my SN
4:03:46 PM jerseyzzlilm6: Isn't it pirate of nazo?
4:04:02 PM Pirate: lol, you are IM'ing Pirate
4:04:16 PM Pirate: i got the "of nazo" as you first msg
4:05:10 PM jerseyzzlilm6: R u serious?! Oooo u know what happend its spaced so I think thts why it got only pirate. I am so sorry! Hah
4:05:33 PM Pirate: yah, i figured that out a long time ago

A crazy lady

10:51:31 PM crzylady88: hii
10:52:00 PM crzylady88: where you get ur sn from?
10:52:18 PM crzylady88: u in the aim scene?
11:03:46 PM Pirate: the aim scene?
11:04:25 PM crzylady88: how u get ur sn?
11:04:36 PM Pirate: why?
11:04:44 PM crzylady88: solo dime
11:04:54 PM Pirate: what?
11:05:12 PM crzylady88: where u got ur sn
11:05:20 PM Pirate: and i asked you why do you want to know
11:05:47 PM crzylady88: why you think i dont know?
11:05:55 PM crzylady88: or u just got it from ur lil hacker friends
11:06:01 PM Pirate: i have no idea, what?
11:06:12 PM crzylady88: cuz i know u just didnt register the sn pirate from aim.com now did u?
11:06:22 PM crzylady88: but its cool i dont need to know how u got ur sn
11:06:34 PM Pirate: depends on how long i have had it, i might have actually gotten it from aol
11:06:55 PM crzylady88: yea thru aol leaks
11:07:02 PM Pirate: leaks?
11:07:05 PM crzylady88: thats how u get ur sns in the first place
11:07:06 PM Pirate: what jargon are you using
Editors Note:
The same person comes back a bit later with the SN: wixch
They were still trying to figure out how I got Pirate :)

Snake likes rum

(05:47:44 PM) Snake: I just bought some pyrat rum in honor of you :-)
(07:03:07 PM) Pirate: sounds good
(07:04:40 PM) Pirate: have one for me
(07:04:58 PM) Snake: i will, my treasure hunting friend, i will
(07:05:14 PM) Pirate: gold is the booty
(07:05:26 PM) Snake: LOL booty is the key to life. for some
(07:05:38 PM) Pirate: booty is life
(07:05:59 PM) Snake: i love lamp
(07:06:03 PM) Snake: and that is the truth
(07:06:12 PM) Snake: im fixing to leave work, later dude
(07:06:18 PM) Pirate: i never really figured out what lamp is
(07:06:23 PM) Snake: lamp is more of
(07:06:26 PM) Snake: spiritual thing
(07:06:31 PM) Snake: than a physical one
(07:06:39 PM) Pirate: then like absinthe
(07:07:55 PM) Snake: i had no idea what that was so i had to look it up